It's been a week since I decided to post my thoughts about parenthood. It's amazing how quickly time goes by these days! But, now the little man is asleep on my chest so I thought I'd try this again... But, first, a cute picture of Owen reflecting on his reflection:
Parenthood is an adventure, that's for sure. When people ask me how I'm enjoying it, my usual response is, "being a mommy the best thing I've ever done... and the hardest." While each day passes in a blur of diaper changes, laundry, and feedings, taking care of a newborn has been an amazing roller coaster.
The challenges
#1: learning to function while completely sleep deprived! Even my 6 weeks at SEA didn't prepare me for this. Some nights, Owen does great - sleeping 5-6 hours at a stretch. Other nights, I am awoken every 2 hours by his loud, needy cry. The problem is, we never know which sleeping Owen we will get!
#2: breastfeeding has been really hard. Owen likes to take his time and often falls asleep during feedings. The lactation consultant also said he has a "disorganized suck" so he doesn't get into a rhythm that lets me know how much he is eating. Therefore, like his sleeping, I can't anticipate how long a feeding will take. We're still working on it but, for the most part, I am pumping often and we are bottle feeding him the breast milk.
#3: finding time for myself. I don't. For instance, it's rare that I take a shower two days in a row and I've been to the gym twice since Owen was born. Mostly, I don't want to miss a moment with the little guy. There will be many missed moments when I go back to work in a few weeks.
#4: hormones. I have been known to cry, literally, over spilt milk. Seriously, Sean spilled some of the breast milk I had pumped and I cried. And, if I thought I was an anxious person before Owen was born.... the hormones have only exacerbated my worry-wart mentality!
But these challenges pale in comparison to the magical feeling I get watching Owen grow...
#1: his faces. My heart melts when Owen smiles at me!! He has several smiles including
- the shy, flirtatious smile when his glance is over your shoulder
- the wide, showing-off his gums, smile
- the "I just farted and it felt good" grin
- the "happy dreams" smile while he is in REM (he just made this face as I type this)
And it's not just his smiles that brighten my day. I love all his funny faces - here are a few recent examples:
#2: His eyes. Owen has these sparkly, inquisitive, big, blue eyes. When he is awake, he loves to look around at EVERYTHING. It blows my mind how intently he looks at the ceiling beams and window blinds. You can tell he is just soaking it all in!
Parenthood is an adventure, that's for sure. When people ask me how I'm enjoying it, my usual response is, "being a mommy the best thing I've ever done... and the hardest." While each day passes in a blur of diaper changes, laundry, and feedings, taking care of a newborn has been an amazing roller coaster.
The challenges
#1: learning to function while completely sleep deprived! Even my 6 weeks at SEA didn't prepare me for this. Some nights, Owen does great - sleeping 5-6 hours at a stretch. Other nights, I am awoken every 2 hours by his loud, needy cry. The problem is, we never know which sleeping Owen we will get!
#2: breastfeeding has been really hard. Owen likes to take his time and often falls asleep during feedings. The lactation consultant also said he has a "disorganized suck" so he doesn't get into a rhythm that lets me know how much he is eating. Therefore, like his sleeping, I can't anticipate how long a feeding will take. We're still working on it but, for the most part, I am pumping often and we are bottle feeding him the breast milk.
#3: finding time for myself. I don't. For instance, it's rare that I take a shower two days in a row and I've been to the gym twice since Owen was born. Mostly, I don't want to miss a moment with the little guy. There will be many missed moments when I go back to work in a few weeks.
#4: hormones. I have been known to cry, literally, over spilt milk. Seriously, Sean spilled some of the breast milk I had pumped and I cried. And, if I thought I was an anxious person before Owen was born.... the hormones have only exacerbated my worry-wart mentality!
But these challenges pale in comparison to the magical feeling I get watching Owen grow...
#1: his faces. My heart melts when Owen smiles at me!! He has several smiles including
- the shy, flirtatious smile when his glance is over your shoulder
- the wide, showing-off his gums, smile
- the "I just farted and it felt good" grin
- the "happy dreams" smile while he is in REM (he just made this face as I type this)
And it's not just his smiles that brighten my day. I love all his funny faces - here are a few recent examples:
#2: His eyes. Owen has these sparkly, inquisitive, big, blue eyes. When he is awake, he loves to look around at EVERYTHING. It blows my mind how intently he looks at the ceiling beams and window blinds. You can tell he is just soaking it all in!
#3: His personality. At 2 months old, you can already tell that Owen is going to be quite the character! (see #1 and previous photo postings)
#4: His appetite. Owen's primary job right now is to grow and he is doing GREAT!
Today, Owen laughed outloud - a real, hearty, happy laugh - for the first time while we were playing with him and I wished I had the power to freeze time. Being able to watch him grow and develop new skills, literally overnight, has been and is magical. Those are the moments that make all the sleep deprivation worth it!
-Marisa
Today, Owen laughed outloud - a real, hearty, happy laugh - for the first time while we were playing with him and I wished I had the power to freeze time. Being able to watch him grow and develop new skills, literally overnight, has been and is magical. Those are the moments that make all the sleep deprivation worth it!
-Marisa
2 comments:
Hi Marisa --
I love reading your reflections on parenting as it demonstrates the continuity of each new generation's discovery of what the previous generation has known well. And the fact that we harbored such similar images and feelings and thoughts since our parenting days only validates all our sensory experiences as we rediscover them, once again, through you. This continuum is so meaningful and so poignant as it reinforces our own love and affection for our once vulnerable and needy and now strong and independent adult children. So maybe, despite all the insecurities about our own parenting abilities (or lack thereof) we didn't really screw up too badly.....
With love always,
Dad (aka Grandpa Steve)
beautiful. just beautiful. loved reading this. and seriously when i read #4 for challenges i said "oh crap" and steve agreed. love y'all.
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